2/20/2006

Ugliest Damn President

In the spirit of intelligent, thought provoking reflection of our Presidents, past and present-let us take pause in our hurried lives to consider these great men. Let's reflect on their contributions to humanity, their impact on society... Their scandals, their executive prowess,their many 'missions accomplished'. Not only are we non-partisan here, but we are capable of being shallow as hell. So-
Who was/is the ugliest damn President? Unlike a real election, your vote matters. It matters to superficial people everywhere that look to America as a beacon of Democracy, a ray of light in the darkness of their oppressive regimes... a glimmer of nonsense in their too-busy-worrying-about-hunger lives. Your vote is about freedom. Do it for Hamas.

44 comments:

IronicEbonics said...

Abraham Lincoln, hands down, no question.

Robot Buddha said...

William Henry Harrison

That Damned Jezebel said...

I'm putting in for Nixon, by the way.

Anita said...

I have to say John Adams. He was just a little too pudgey around the gills for my taste.

And, btw, I actually think Abraham Lincoln had kind bizarrely interesting look about him.

Nixon, fuggedaboudit.

But I still go with Adams.

Earl Bockenfeld said...

I put Nixon in as Dubya lite.

The smallest and shortest book ever written, "Things George W. Bush Did Right". Who can argue with Helen Thomas saying Dubya is "the worst President ever".

Robot Buddha said...

See, I'm with Fosco. I was going to say Nixon, but that's such a given...he was a genuinely not-attractive person.

I guess I'll stick with Harrison. Damn it!

Lily said...

Cheney.



Nah. I'm just kidding.

Jeb. Oh wait, that didn't happen yet.

Nixon.

Omnipotent Poobah said...

Millard Filmore. I can't remember what he looked like, but when I hear his name all I can think of are mallards...and a duck's ass isn't attractive.

Well, it makes perfect sense to ME.

Anonymous said...

Fosco the intern.

The Statistics said...

superficial?
I just hate those ballots, I can never get one that matches my shoes. Thanks God for those voting machines. THANKS GOD!
George Washington set the standard and is by far the hottest prez evah!

the heretic

That Damned Jezebel said...

Let's just hope you weren't trying to dress inspired by hanging chads...

No need to give the feds THAT much information.

Kvatch said...

Millard Fillmore?

Come on! It's got be Martin Van Buren with those bizzare mutton chops. Though I have to say that John Quincy Adams looks like he was beaten with an ugly stick.

I can't bring myself to dis Lincoln, though. No doubt he was ugly, but I guess I must just be looking through to the soul.

Helen Wheels said...

William Henry Harrison is one of the ugliest things I've ever laid eyes on. Check out his can o' worms visage here.

michael the tubthumper said...

I looked through the photographs in the New Year's Honours List, I was struck (as usual) by the quite exceptional ugliness and vulgarity of the faces displayed there. It seems to be almost the rule that the kind of person who earns the right to call himself Lord Percy de Falcontowers should look at best like an overfed publican and at worst like a tax-collector with a duodenal ulcer. But our country is not alone in this. Anyone who is a good hand with scissors and paste could compile an excellent book entitled Our Rulers, and consisting simply of published photographs of the great ones of the earth. The idea first occurred to me when I saw in Picture Post some 'stills' of Beaverbrook delivering a speech and looking more like a monkey on a stick than you would think possible for anyone who was not doing it on purpose"

george orwell - As I please 7th Jan 1944

Neil Shakespeare said...

Definitely 'Abaham Aninkonpoop'. He said so himself. (See my blog. Contains a link to your contest.)

The Ass Troll said...

Eleanor

Left of Center said...

Lincoln, Nixon, van Buren? The ugliest President ever is a living breathing man. His name is Dick Cheney! Scowling, blood thirsty, demon hearted Cheney. We're talking ugly clear to the bone here folks. Ugly that makes babies cry.

Lew Scannon said...

I was going to say Lyndon Johnson, or Nixon, but LOC convinced me. It's Draft Deferment Dick "Permascowl" Cheney.

The Biblical Voice Of Charlton Heston said...

Permascowl! I love it!

AJ said...

Not to start with any conspiracy theory, but my vote would go to Wilson.
After all, he smartly decided to "take holiday" when the clowns met to decide our nation's fate for decades to come..

Lily said...

You should apply to Human Resources for the position of Conspiracist. (Lew's old position, the board turned on Kvatch when he started parading around with the umbrella, we were forced to take the CEO position from his cold amphibious fingers... Nothing says leadership liability like an umbrella) You don't get an intern though...you'll make your own coffee,too.

So, will Lew agree to parade around blogarama with the profile pic of the winning Ugliest Damn President????
Come on Lew, suck it up for the team!!!!

pissed off patricia said...

Have we had any other presidents who could look as much like a howler monkey as bush can? If we have, I'll vote for him.

Tina said...

My vote is for William Taft... I just can't get past that handlebar mustache. Slap him in a striped shirt and a hat and he's a portly barber shop quartet singer all the way... and barber shop quartets blow.

GraemeAnfinson said...

I agree Tina, I was going to say Taft as well. Why does every fat white guy with a mustache look like wilford brimley?

Esentient HumanBeing said...

William Jefferson Clinton; his "hair" was an abomination! The man had the greasy "pot" hair of some guitar strumming Oxonian street busker.

CV Rick said...

People! People! The original Dick Cheney - the armed force over compromise President - the kill the indians and mexicans cause they 'ain't' humans President was as ugly or uglier than "Shoot your Friend in the Face" Dead-Eye Dick! Zachary Taylor Look at that mug. Look at that nose. Who said ugly is only skin deep?

And, this time in the right thread.

peacechick Mary said...

I dunno. For some reason I'm turned off by Washington's wooden teeth and possible splinters flying about. Nixon with the ski slope nose. So many ugly Presidents, so hard to decide.

cali said...

My vote: Dick Cheney. That creepy way his mouth moves.

Got the Most Annoying Senator at my place. It's official.

nite swimming

tp said...

Wilford Brimley makes me think of the Monopoly man...not that that has anything to do with it.

Lew Scannon said...

I'll do it under the condition I can change my vote to local hometown boy makes good Gerald R. Ford, the first President to never win an election. Because if Double Draft Deferment Dick Cheney wins, I don't want to have to use the picture of him sitting on the bench exposing the unit and the twins, which I'm sure Lily would make me do.

Rex Kramer, Danger Seeker said...

I can't beleive I'm the only one who finds FDR truly terrifying. Do you people mean to tell me that a gimp in metal leg braces doesn't freak you out?

Abe comes in as a close second. Sometimes that mole follows me around in my nightmares.

Lily said...

I think that is very rude, Rex. I use metal braces, and would not be able to get around without them. I'm not ashamed, I have learned to get around and I can even climb stairs. My family has renovated our entire home, and it has not been easy. I don't think you should make fun of people. Sometimes your jokes just go too far. You don't know how many of us are handicapped.

Lew Scannon said...

Lily
Here. is this what you wanted?

Anonymous said...

I vote McKinley, not so much for how he looked, but because Karl Rove thinks he was the model president. He's been trying to model GWB's presidency after McKinley, who made a pre-emptive strike against the Phillipines to expand our empire & make us occupiers. McK was assassinated by an "anarchist" student of Emma Goldman. As he was executed, the "anarchist" proclaimed "I killed the President because he was the enemy of the good people".

My vote for best looking president is Jefferson, but then I'm partial to smart redheads. D.K.

Lord Jonathon of Rear End said...

You potato, I say potato(e). You say handicap, I say handi-able.

But then again I work with retards, and although told thats a little politically incorrect.
No one's gonna tell me who I can and can't work with.

Anonymous said...

Lily, didn't you ski two weeks ago?

lily said...

Dammit. Dammit.

No Blood for Hubris said...

Cheney is the ugliest preznit, inside and out. 2nd is Bubble Boy, because of his insides.

Fosco said...

Looks like CHENEY wins the Ugliest Damn President Annual President's Day contest....thank you to everyone.

RichM said...

Man, I'm too late.

My choice would have been William Henry Harrison. And I can see where CV Rick is coming from Zachary Taylor got hit with the ugly stick too. And Andrew Jackson look like he got an overdose of Chris Walken syndrom pills.
http://www.whitehouse.gov/history/presidents/

But I defer to the unwashed masses in their judgement.

jenny said...

besides bush, wh taft. near and dear to my heart hailing from my home town. the man is known for being the largest president ever, he got stuck in a bathtub. and he is responsible for my inbred pipsqueak of a governor.

http://www.wellswooster.com/images/william-taft-tub.jpg

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