6/09/2006

Bridal Boot Camp

June is traditionally the month for weddings in the US. Among the many preparations a couple plan is a new twist as many brides-to-be are going through a bridal boot camp to get themselves in shape for that big day.When I first saw this, a million thoughts raced through my mind. Isn't marriage torture enough with out putting yourself through the ringer before hand? This is on top of all the pre-nuptial planning a bride goes through, because, face it, many men are not into the pre-nuptial planning (although they do consider a pre-nuptial agreement)and just agree with what ever their future spouse decides because from the time they are little girls, most women have an idea of what they want on their wedding day, while most men avoid thinking about marriage altogether, let alone what color their wedding scheme should be.
Another thought crossing my mind was the vanity of this. A bride's wedding is her one day to be the star of the show, wouldn't the man she loves (and who loves her) be happy with her, even if she had a packed on a few pounds? Yes, but then I realized that while most weddings don't last, wedding photos are forever, and no one wants to look back and see what a porker they were for their first marriage. "No wonder my husband left me for that skinny little intern in accounting, look how fat I was when we got married," she thinks as she shovels another quart of Haagen-Daaz down her esophagus.But no, that wasn't it either.
Then, it hit me:All through their younger days, women are shown an idealized image of what society thinks they should look like at the time of their wedding. However, men are not under the same pressure. There is no idealized image of a groom, he rents his tux and won't be handing it down to his sons to get married in. He's just going to get fat spending every weekend in front of the tube watching sports and drinking beer, why delay the inevitable? The main reason the average man gets married comes down to one thing: the bachelor party. It's the one time society allows them to be the disgusting sex obsessed pigs they are underneath that sober exterior.
Well, I say, if your bride-to-be is going through a boot camp to get in shape for your nuptials, you'd better shape up, too. Otherwise, she just might kick your ass.

19 comments:

Anonymous said...

Let's face it. If men weren't the sex-obsessed pigs that we are (and what's this they stuff, Lew?), there wouldn't be a whole lot of weddings in June or any other month. It's all part of intelligent design. ;-)

Anonymous said...

Weddings are a waste of money, most of them will end up divorced and they should put the money toward debt, a house, or education.

This 20-30k wedding stuff is repulsive.
Dreaming about a wedding is not something I ever once remember doing.

Now dreaming of travelling, yeah. A girl could do a lot of travelling with that kind of money.

I suppose you could say they want to start out healthy? Its not just a vanity issue.

Maybe everyone should go to boot camp when the reruns are on in summer.

PBS said...

I agree with Elizabeth Branford that too much money is spent on weddings. Yes, it's a very special day for a couple, but only one day. The money could be better spent in so many other places.

Anonymous said...

Hey! Not so fast! Some of that stuff is a necessity, like an open bar. No way are you going to get me to come to your wedding (with my $25 Jiffy Lube Gift certificate) if there's no open bar.

Anonymous said...

This 20-30k wedding stuff is repulsive.
Dreaming about a wedding is not something I ever once remember doing.


Moreover, most brides are in denial about what $30K pricetag really means for her budding financial merger with her husband. It is really their first joint debt--compounded by the second joint debt, the ring.

Anonymous said...

Thats exactly how many treat it, as a photographic event!

Many women call it "their day to be perfect". Perfect is free. The cost is just in what you spend accepting yourself.

Lew Scannon said...

abi,
My bachelor party consisted of a number of local musicians getting together to have a jam session around a keg of beer and a couple of fifths of Jim Beam. From what I can remember.

Diane S. said...

I don't know. I eloped for my first wedding, got married in a court house by a JP with a coat a used car salesman wouldn't wear and three days growth of beard. I got my "dream" wedding (which was nothing near $30K, more like $1K) for my second marriage. The second marriage didn't last either, but that day was the happiest day of my life, and I'm glad of the time, thought and preparation that went into planning it.

The thing that surprised me about my second wedding, the real wedding, was how touched - really, really touched - I was by the friends and family members who had traveled miles and miles to be with me on that day. It meant the world to me to have them there, and I'm so grateful to all of them that came.

Anonymous said...

The other side though is that often parents must foot the bill for these huge events and sometimes they feel obligated. Sometimes it also the first "show" they put on for the new in laws with whom there is often competition. Plus, girls have to show off and belabor these stupid decisions. get together, choose entrees and favors...gives women something to bond around maybe but seems a huge waste of money regardless. Also the bridesmaids and others are forced into what can be difficult financial obligations. One dress I had was over $200 but I had to get what I was told and be like the other girls. And it sounds cheap to crab about it. So you go along. Refusal isn;t even an option. What a racket.

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