4/15/2006

Naming A War: What About Bob?

The war on terror has gone through many permutations. First, it was Operation:Infinite Justice, until it was pointed out that according to Islamic law, only Allah can dole out the ol' Infinite Justice. Then at some point in time, it became Operation:Iraqi Freedom, even though the Iraqis have less freedoms now than they did under saddam.
Then it became the Global War On Terror, followed by the Global War on Violent Extremism, until it was pointed out that war is violent extremism, so they changed it to the Global Struggle Against Violent Extremism, which had a nice acronym (GSAVE) to go with it, until once again, it was pointed out that being the world's only superpower, the struggling part seemed a bit, well, pussilient. Besides, the only people really struggling from it, aside from the families of the troops over there fighting, was the President himself, struggling in opinion polls as the war drags on longer than he claimed it would and the other claims for the invasion (WMD, democracy, terrorists) not panning out either.
Now, however, it's being referred to by CENTCOM as The Long War. They might as well call it the unwinnable war, because that's what it is. Because they're fighting an ideology, which is sort of like fighting a ghost (like BinLaden and Zarqawi)with bombs. No matter how many bombs you drop, or bullets you shoot, or innocent civilians you write off as "collateral damage", the ideology will still carry on.
Of course, there are advantages to calling it the Long War. You no longer need to tie oil-rich countries to terrorism to invade them, giving a green light to the insanity of invading Iran because they're building a power station (oh, and they've enriched enough uranium to light a watch), or any other country the neocons feel they need to invade in order to secure the natural resources there in. It's just part of the Long War.
Right now, Bush and the Republicans are planning to flood the labor market in this country with real unemployment running at 12%. Why do something like that? Because a long war needs a long supply of blood to spill in the name of the US. It's either that, or start the draft, which would mean that a lot of the offspring of the elite (Democrats, Republicans, Corporate High Priests)would be expected to serve in the wars their parents support.Or run the risk of being called draft dodgers when they use a student deferrment to keep them out of combat, and then run for a seat in the fiefdom known as Congress. Plus, all the long term exposure to DU would produce some freaky looking Grandchildren that would make for some awkward photo ops come campaign season.
So the Long war it is. just remember, it's not for your lifetime, but for your children's lifetime, too.

( Just a little reminder for y'all to read Lily's column this Sunday at The Blue Republic, even though I can't, because my damn computer won't let me go there! Sorry, Lily, if you've been sending me messages and I haven't returned them.I'm working on getting this thing back up to speed)


13 comments:

Yukkione said...

operation money bags

michael the tubthumper said...

they were going to call it operation iraqi liberation but realised that that spelt O.I.L.

no shit

Citisucks said...

Myself I prefer the "war on dissent". Particularly given that it has spread to the US in the pigs violently assaulting those who are willing to speak the truth like Cindy Sheehan.

Anonymous said...

Operation Bob makes as much sense as any of the others.

What Brand Are You? could be used in the future when they run outa misleading names. I tried GWB and the site tossed out operation ridiculus, which works for the operation or the leaders directing the clusterf**k.

Anonymous said...

Kowboy Koward's Operation Lasting Legacy

Jeremy said...

How about Operation..

Freedom Under Christianity's Kuwait-based Military Eforecement, or

Operation FUCK ME!

Unknown said...

i couldn't have said it better than jeremy!

Anonymous said...

OH! lew I am back from vacation and laughing- I missed you guys!!!!

Good ones!

rev. billy bob gisher ©2008 said...

lucious, i like lucious for a name. it's good for working the ladies you know.

michael the tubthumper said...

i also heard "the war on the abstract noun" which i think is quite funny

Anonymous said...

Lilly, suggest you turn this into a contest and then give like the top 4 or 5 entries to the decider to decide what he really wants to call this. I would have given you a definite number of entries but that would require a decision and we know who makes those.

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