12/21/2005

The Holiday Shitlist

Here at Lose The Noose, we make a regular sport of talking about what sucks. To all of you out there that also provide the needed public service of talking about what sucks- consider this an appreciative hat tip. To honor our consumaculture, I propose the Holiday Shitlist. Please feel free to voice your negativity, misguided angst, stereotypical boycott fetishes...vent your anti-corporate malaise among friends.

1.FOX : We know O'Reilly sucks. Fox sucks. ("Family Guy"-uh, not so suckish) But all predictable lists must begin with Fox or Wal Mart, right?
2. Target Sucks, Whore Blogs Suck More: While there was much debate about the reports of Target pharmacy employees and the dispensing of birth control(the company denies the scenario as outlined on many websites and blogs,call that one yourself) what sucks more are the number of Blogs that had "Target Sucks,I will never shop there" posts WITH FREAKIN TARGET ADS ON THEIR BLOGS!!!!!Now I am not spiteful-although the links would be amusing and I am not perfect, but the irony is far from cool. Those of you that frequent some feminist heavy hitters know exactly what I mean here. Nuff said.

3. Sony: For those that are unfamiliar with the Sony Sodomizing of our disc drives, it involved installing anti-copying software to unknowing users that also left them vulnerable to viral menaces.
The blog Bastard of Art and Commerce has a post on this as well as examples of CD's implicated.

4. Trey Anastasio: You suck because a- you are on this Sony CD list b-I loved you and c- you are not my daddy's Jerry. "Surrender the Air" my ass. This Phish lover is moving on with her life.

5. Google: For their shameless stance on spying and censorship. Big Google Is Watching!

6.Ian Rankin: And I quote: "The best crime writing is as good as anything else in the literary canon, and right now crime writers around the world are confronting society's deepest problems, worries and uncertainties in a way the 'literary' novel sometimes avoids." While I must say 'Constant Gardener' made me cry, I think this statement is a stretch and I hate the way we are becoming apologetic about our standards. My problem is with the way we dumb down the arts and then make the claims that it is 'as good' or 'as relevant'. I am not defending elitism and snobbery, but rum in my coke doesn't make it a cocktail. Call things what they are, be it hack fiction or Forster.

7. Senator Ted Stevens: Global warm your stoic steel soul, you pig.

8. The (now Former)Dover School Board: For shaming PA. Oh, wait. Santorum currently shames PA.

9. The EPA for their relentless desire to test toxins on children
10. Abercrombie and Fitch- suck couture.
Your turn!

10 comments:

tp said...

What sucks are things like X box 360. How many times will they make these gaming systems, video now players, juicebox, gameboys, playstations....collective electronic SHIT only to have a new one unveiled every damn December?
Even the baby toy industry is in on this action.

Greg Mills said...

Thanks for the hat tip, Lily. I am the Bastard of Art and Commerce, and the acid written on this here blog warms me like a fucking yule log.

Keep up the vitriol. It works as a wrinkle cream and smells great!

Lew Scannon said...

How can you have a Christmas, oops, I mean Holiday shitlist and not include Dick (Head) Cheney?The guy who wants the okay to torture and extend the Patriot Act indefinetly deserves a few harsh words.
The person who created "A Soldier's Night Before Christmas" deserves to be on there for creating the most blatant piece of bull shit propaganda I've ever heard.
Joel Osteen's wife, for showing the world what true Christian compassion and forgiveness is all about, as well as selflessness and patience.
Every jeweler in the country for telling wives and husbands the best gift you can give her is a piece of jewelry that depreciates fifty percent the second it leaves the store.
What about the Democrats, for doing absolutely positively nothing, again, while Bush and Co. run rampant over that god damned piece of paper, the Constitution.
And since you put Fox on there, why not the New York Times? they sat on the story that Bush had been spying on Americans without warrants for two years. Not only that, The Times is the home to Judy Miller. But why stop there? Why not the whole corporate Media elite? I could go on, but I'd be better off just posting my own.

Lily said...

Lew, thats the point! Rant away! get it out! I feel your pain, sweetie. It ALL sucks, don't you feel the holiday spirit yet?
Of course I couldn't mention everyone and everything. I was just trying to warm us up!

Lily said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
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